This site is about my experience with cervical dysplasia, as well as anything else I might feel like discussing!

My halloween costume….I’m Super Nervous!


Since last night I have been a bundle of nerves, just wish I could stop thinking about the LEEP tomorrow.  I don’t know how people can be so calm about things like this, and I know I shouldn’t worry about something I can’t control, but I do.  I know there is going to be pain, and I know I can deal with it, but I am tired of dealing with it.  Aside from the dysplasia, I have a ton of titanium in my knee due to a fracture, and a heart condition.  I would love to know what it’s like to be healthy and normal……..not sure if anyone knows what that is. 

As well, I don’t think any woman should have to go through any procedure like this fully awake.  I don’t understand how the doctors and nurses think it is “no big deal”, since to me it’s a huge deal.  I’m sure to many women it is too!  It might be bennificial for these same doctors and nurses to go through a colposcopy an a punch biopsy, just so they have an understanding of how uncomfortable and invasive it can be.  This would also work for men with their cancers and conditions below the belt.  And then we wouldn’t have to listen to them go on and on about how it’s nothing.  Well it’s not your life that’s threatened….so I am going to go with it is something, it is something to worry about, and want to avoid.  Though I will mention that when I am there the nurses are very supportive and kind, and they get me through the actual procedure, so I am not knocking them down.  And I know that maybe they are just saying things will be ok, because they hope it will.

I know I don’t have any choice but to face the situation, since it will only get worse if I ignore it, but I’d really like this to be the last time for a long while that I have to deal with any kind of new and horrible medical condition.  I will try and update people over the next couple of days, depending on how I feel.


6 thoughts on “My halloween costume….I’m Super Nervous!

  1. I’m thinking about you today and hoping you’re feeling alright! Good vibes coming your way!

  2. I agree with you: sedation should always be an option for going through medical procedures. Sometimes the mental trauma can cause more damage and pain than the procedure itself. Since we live in a world where sedation is readily available, why not offer that option?There seems to be a huge difference between Canada and the USA on that front. In the USA, it is always an option, and the health professionals don’t seem to judge you for wanting it. I know that the US system is flawed in countless ways, but as a patient I am much happier here and my anxiety is not dismissed as frivolous.

    • They really don’t belittle anxiety and fears in the states, and accept that sedatives can be beneficial. It’s not like they had to knock me out, but the ativan did help a lot. It’s funny to see how each country differs. Like with my knee, in the states they take the hardware out for everyone after 6-12months, but in Canada they leave it in.

      • Its probably about money too…In the US, if you want to pay for full or partial sedation, either you pay it out of pocket or your insurance company will cover it. In Canada, the government foots the bill, so I bet doctors are told to use it as little as possible.

      • I totally agree, and I think too often doctors and nurses pass things off as “no big deal”. They do procedures like this daily, so it is no big deal to them. They forget I don’t do this very often!

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